I was Bullied in School & Got No Confidence With Girls — How to Be Less Nervous Around Girls?
Are you tired of feeling insecure in life? Does this affect your relationship with women? Maybe you are invisible to women because you don’t have a confident aura? Or at the very least, you lack the confidence to find a girlfriend because of your bad experiences in school?
Does getting bullied hold you back from becoming the confident man you want to be?
I know exactly how you feel because that used to be me. I got bullied a lot in high school. I probably was the number one target back then. I was very insecure, had zero skills to assert myself, and I was very shy and awkward with everybody — people in general, and especially with girls.
I couldn’t even make eye contact with a girl. And I just didn’t know how to talk to girls. I felt very anti-social, always out of place, rarely feeling like I belonged. The scars from my years of getting bullied and made fun of really had a strong impact on my confidence, my lack of assertiveness, and my ability to seem charismatic and fun to talk to.
But if I could go back in time, I’d tell my former self that I wasn’t really unlikeable, unattractive, or awkward to talk to. I just had to grow out of all my feelings of rejection. Getting bullied made me feel like something about me wasn’t good enough. I carried that feeling into my experiences of getting rejected by girls.
Let me tell you a bit about how I became confident in life, made a lot of friends, and began to feel extremely confident around women. Hopefully it can inspire you and help you.
Bullying Made Me An Introvert — Nah, Bullying Made Me Stronger!
I was the perfect target for bullies. Shy, insecure, and lacking strong male role models. My dad was also very passive and an insecure man, so that probably added to it. I didn’t know how to defend myself when I initially was made fun of. And when kids saw that I could be pushed around, they just went further for it.
As a result of becoming a punching bag for every bully, I retreated more into my shell and become more introverted. Most likely, bullying gave me social anxiety. I don’t even know to which extent I am an introvert. I used to always get introvert scores at the famous MTBI test, but after I became confident with women, the test always categorizes me as an extrovert now — though even nowadays, I feel introverted and enjoy my alone time.
Getting bullied can change your personality, or at the very least, bullying heightens your insecure tendencies. And these insecurities can manifest by you acting like a beta male with women. That’s okay. I want you to be an alpha male, to exude confidence, and be assertive, a strong fighter, and to be respected by everybody. But don’t beat yourself up if you struggle with showing strength as a man. You will get there.
You can be strong, confident, and behave like an alpha male, and finally get girls interested in you.
How do I know? Because that’s what happened to me.
Dating used to be a nightmare to me. I couldn’t get a girlfriend in high school. It was obvious that I was very insecure. Even afterwards, most of my relationships didn’t last. Most of them were random, definitely nothing that I had consciously planned or something that I actively made happen. When I found a girlfriend, it was almost always “luck“.
But my girlfriends were never happy with me in the long-run. That’s because I didn’t know how to assert myself, lead in the relationship, and act in way that was commanding respect and love.
But eventually, I had one serious relationship. I was deeply in love with the girl. I thought I’d marry her someday. She was my first true love, and she broke my heart. She was partying a lot in the last months of the relationship when she wasn’t happy, and based on her actions, she most likely also cheated on me. It was a painful experience.
I was 27 then, and still had no confidence in life and with women. I was so broken, that I was hitting rock bottom. And that’s where I made my big change in life, and got out of my shell.
I was still that beta male guy. I’ll never forget, when I was once out with my girlfriend at a bar, and we were playing darts. And another guy was hitting on her because he thought she wasn’t my girlfriend. That’s the kind of beta male energy that I projected.
I was done being the week kind of guy. And fortunately, because I was bullied so much in my younger years, I had become kind of an arrogant guy in my 20s. Not in a mean way, but I always wanted to be the best at everything. Prove everybody wrong. This had worked for me incredibly well in my career, and now it was time to apply the same principle in my love life.
My breakup pain became my fuel. I threw myself into studying every scientific paper on relationships and attraction I could find. I read books, podcasts, went to men’s groups. I learned anything I could about masculinity and confidence. And then, I went to work.
I began going out to bars, clubs, Latin dance nights. I went to casual events, rather than business events. Anything to learn how to overcome my social anxiety. I learned to socialize, talk to people, enjoy myself without trying to get a girl’s number. And in that process, I became insanely confident to the degree that women began approaching me.
Within only a year, I went from being invisible to women to having more romantic options than I knew what to do with. I had tripled my income, even though that wasn’t even my main goal. I made countless new friends, and I was living my best life as a digital nomad on Bali Island.
This showed me that even introverts can be alpha males — confident, assertive, and irresistibly attractive to almost every woman I met.
Even if you never learned how to assert yourself, you can learn how to be more “aggressive“, how to get your way, how to have clear boundaries in life, and how to never let yourself get pushed around ever again. Your experiences of getting bullied may seem like they are holding you back, but trust me, they will be your greatest asset in becoming a high value man.
I learned a lot, especially in that one year where I went from 0 to 100 regarding my attractiveness level and my dating confidence skills. So let me share 5 reasons why guys who got bullied in school can be confident when dating women and how to go from shy to outgoing:
5 Reasons Why Moving On From Bullying In School And Becoming An Attractive Man Is Possible
Social Skills Can Be Learned — Every Man Can Learn To Be Charismatic
If you feel awkward in social situations, know this: social skills are just that — skills. They can be learned, practiced, and mastered. I used to be unable to be outgoing at parties. I never knew how to talk to people, especially not with women.
But once I really put my mind to hit, applied a few mindset principles, and changed my approach with how I interacted with people, I became just as popular as the guys that I always envied when out and about.
Social skills are like any other skill — the more you practice, the better you become. You can learn to read social cues, especially female attraction signs. You can learn which women want to talk to you.
You can practice how to have great conversations with anybody without stressing yourself or worrying about what to say next. You can live in the moment and have conversations that feel as effortless as if you’d be talking to your best friend. You can be fun, charming, charismatic and full of energy when you talk with girls wherever you go.
These are universal skills that can be used throughout your life, and they are easy to learn. Often it takes less than a few months to reap 80% of the rewards.
Your Past Doesn’t Define Your Future – You Are More Attractive Than You May Think
Being bullied in the past doesn’t doom you to a life of insecurity or being forever alone. You may think that you are unattractive, have no charisma, appear to be a loser, and so on. But it’s quite the opposite. Overcoming any challenges you are facing regarding being more attractive can be resolved quicker than you might believe possible.
I used to think that I’m not attractive when I was younger. And sure, I could have been more muscular. Man, was I a skinny little boy – even up to my 30s! But even before I looked hyper-masculine and mature, I had already overcome the bullying and was an extremely attractive and confident man — and women were chasing me all over the place!
Whatever it is that is going to attract your dream girl is already within you. Whether that’s your ambitions, your passion for a hobby, your honesty, kindness, or frankly, many factors combined. And yes, even your looks are included in this. You will be the type of many girls even while you’re still working on looking more attractive. If you adopt the right mindset, begin to work on yourself, and stay on the right path, women will become attracted to you within just a few weeks. All it takes are a few small behavior changes — none of which mean you’ll have to change who you are fundamentally as a man.
The “Prove Them Wrong” Mindset Will Make You Stand Out From Other Men
With what I’m about to say next, I don’t want to belittle any man who’s already naturally confident or never had to struggle with bullying. But here me when I say, that you have something that those types of guys don’t have:
Extreme motivation to change. The pain that you felt growing up because you weren’t accepted by your peers, is going to turn you into a monster — the good kind of monster. The work horse. The monster that wants to be strong, fierce, and learn to control itself.
We often grow the most from our biggest setbacks and struggles in life. Unfortunately you had to deal with a lot of unfair treatment when you were bullied, but that means that there is something for you at stake. You want to change. You want to have a better life. You are done with feeling lonely, insecure, weak, or downright unattractive next to another guy. You want to be the guy that girls check out when entering the room.
For you this isn’t just a little hobby or experiment. Let’s be real. In a moment, later down this page, I’ll promote you my book. This is a relatively long sales letter, but you’re still reading. You are determined to become a more confident man. Perhaps there’s even a little bit of anger or resentment in you that’s pushing you to become your best self. And that is perfectly fine.
All I know is that you are going to become an incredible man, because you have to draw from strong negative emotions, which you’re going to channel and transform into the most powerful, positive force for change.
They say success is the best revenge. Some of my bullies who used to pick on me non-stop, thinking they were superioer to me, are now dating extremely overweight, unattractive women. Because they lived their entire lives in their comfort zone. That’s all they could as weak men who used to pick on even weaker guys in high school.
They never get to travel, and they live average lives. Meanwhile, I’m a multiple best-selling book author. I own two technology startups, I’m with a beautiful woman who could be a model. And I live the dream life on the beach, in paradise, every single day. Been doing it for almost a decade as of writing this paragraph.
This will be you. Your motivation will drive you to become the most outstanding man. If you choose to take action and change your outcomes right now, then five years from now, you’ll be the guy everyone will be shocked to see again. The kid who got bullied in high school? Impossible to recognize. You’ll be so attractive, confident, masculine and strong, that you’ll literally be dropping the jaws of your classmates.
But more than the good feeling when you know that you took the hard road, and worked on yourself with real struggle, it feels good to live a good life. At some point, all the things from the past won’t even exist in your mind anymore. You’ll simply be living such a great life because you had something at stake, and you did the work.
As a great serial entrepreneur friend of mine once said, which inspired me for years to come: “Some people work one year of their live in ways that most people don’t want to, so that they can live the rest of their live in a way that most can’t.“
Hard Times Make Strong Men — You Only Have Good Things Ahead Of You
Being bullied, with seemingly no way to fight back is a terrible experience. I still remember when multiple guys in high school would gang up on me while waiting for class to start. It just wasn’t fair. As much as it’s a confidence-shattering experience, it also teaches you something about resilience.
Yes, of course, the biggest form of resilience would be to fight back, and moving forward, you will learn how to assert your needs, wants, and when someone abuses you, you will become headstrong and say no. I want you to realize that you can become this kind of alpha male who never lets himself be pushed around, used, lied to, abused, and more.
But, going back to getting bullied: You’ve learned to deal with hardships. You think that talking to women is one of the hardest things in the world? Think again! It’s extremely easy! You just think it’s difficult because nobody has ever taught you how. It’s because you’ve never experienced how easy it is to actually make friends or have women show strong signs of attraction for you.
Trust me, beautiful women will chase you once you learn a few things about attraction and what women crave. Add a little bit of improved social skills and a tiny bit of trying that works for you, and you will become the most sought after man in no time.
Going through this phase is extremely easy for a man who’s been bullied, because a few rejections by the first few girls during your first attempts may hurt a little bit, but with the right mindset, very quickly, this frustration will turn into success. And every time that women become interested in you, you will begin to feel more and more confident.
And before you know it, you won’t even remember what it felt like to get bullied. Now you’ll be the type of man that even the bullies wish they were. When faced with challenges, you’ll have the inner strength to persevere where others might give up. You’ve cultivated your resilience to not give up even when you’re beaten to the floor. And from here on out, there’s only one way to go: Up and above.
Your attractiveness, charisma, confidence, charm, social skills, passions, hobbies, flirting skills, and so on. All of them will climb beyond what you ever thought to be possible. And women will be drawn to this new kind of energy. Having a massive makeover, and completely shifting your entire way of being, and all of a sudden feeling incredibly confident, is an amazing feeling. Trust me, women will love the new you who kept on working on himself despite of all the bad stuff that happened to you in the past.
Women Are Attracted To Men Who Work On Themselves And Work Hard
Women aren’t just attracted to confident men — they’re attracted to men who are actively working on themselves. Remember my bullies who are now with unattractive women? There’s a reason why that happened? Women are naturally attracted to men who never accept the status quo — men who always want to become harder, better, stronger, faster.
By beginning a self-improvement journey, you’re automatically more desirable to a woman. Whether you focus more on general confidence and being less socially awkward, or you focus more on dating confidence, either way, women will notice that you are the kind of men who has invested in himself.
Recognizing that you can do better in some areas of your life, and then doing the hard work to consciously seek advice, accept that you were doing certain things wrong, and then trying out better approaches, despite the fact that it’s not always easy, shows a woman that you are a man of ambition.
Women love men who are self-aware, humble, ambitious and committed to never stop pursuing their goals, passions and purpose. Even though women often say that they don’t like men who actively try to become more attractive and seductive, the reality is that a woman’s action trumps anything.
When you are working hard on yourself to become more confident, to be more outgoing, and to learn to make new friends and contribute to your social circle, it shows women that you’re the kind of man to pay attention to. And they will want to know why you have so much grit to keep on improving yourself. A woman wants to be with a man who can take care of her. Someone who’s not afraid to challenge the status quo — which of course, includes challenging a relationship that has become stale. Women want to be with a man who has a growth mindset, because that implies a willingness to keep on working on a great relationship as a couple.
Your ambition to overcome your anxieties and bullying trauma is a clear sign that you have what it takes to take care of a woman — once you have transformed yourself to the minimum required amount, most women will notice how attractive you are.
Bullied To Alpha – A Dating Guide On Overcoming Bullying Trauma
I used to be helpless when it came to feeling confident. I still remember my classmate in high school, who was attractive, sporty, popular, girls liked him… I was anything but that.
And even after high school, I never really became confident like guys who always seemed to effortlessly attract women. Whether at vocational school, in a club, or just waiting at the train station, I always felt nervous. Maybe I was still “looking over my shoulder” because of all the bullying.
I am sure the energy that I gave off was one of the reasons why women never noticed me. Even though I hadn’t been bullied for years, it’s as if years of disrespect had taught me to be shy, quiet, always questioning myself, and generally unable to be open up during social settings — especially, acting natural around women seemed impossible to me.
But I learned that every man can reinvent himself. Whatever you had to go through — or maybe you’re still going through it — you can break free from your chains of self-doubt.,
Good looks can be cultivated. High social status can be earned. Charm and confidence can be trained. With the right mindset, even extremely shy men can become confident.
You have the power to shift your dating mentality, to see yourself as the attractive, confident, smart and inspiring man that you are. And with those mindset shifts, you can push yourself beyond your limits and achieve incredible results — physically with your looks, and spiritually with your attitude and social skills.
I’ve been there and I went from zero social skills, to be one of the popular guys in my group. Once you make this shift, you’ll attract women without lifting a finger.
I know that you might feel intimidated. Believe me, when I got bullied, I kept those insecurities with me for nearly 15 years. I know it’s scary to try and become more confident as a man. You might feel like you’re too damaged, too shy, or too “different” to ever be that guy who easily talks to women.
But this is exactly why I wrote my book “Book Title“ I wrote it for guys like you and me — guys who’ve been through the trauma of bullying and struggle to see themselves as attractive or worthy. It took me years to learn how to overcome my fears as a man, and I’ve distilled everything I learned into this book. It’s your roadmap to transform from a shy, insecure guy into a confident alpha male who naturally attracts women.
In This Dating Book For Men, I share:
- How to develop unshakeable masculine confidence that attracts women naturally without even approaching them
- How to become confident and reframe your beliefs about yourself — a mindset approach for every shy man to feel and look more attractive
- The key traits of masculinity that women find irresistible
- The psychological principles that make women notice a man and how to leverage these confidence principles
- A scientifically proven method to learn how to overcome the constant fear of rejection by women
- How to develop rock-solid self-esteem as a man — become so confident that you no longer need anybody’s validation or approval, which makes you more attractive to women
- How to stop being socially awkward, become outgoing and enjoy meeting people, and becoming the man in the room that girls want to talk to
- How to become naturally assertive as a man and always get your way in life and especially with women — no more acting nice or too passive
- The secrets to effective communication that will make women eager to chase you and go on dates with you
- The art of creating sexual tension and chemistry that makes women crave your attention
- How to build a fulfilling and purposeful life that attracts beautiful women
- Strategies for maintaining a healthy, passionate relationship once you’ve found the right woman
Imagine waking up every day feeling confident in your masculinity, knowing exactly how to attract amazing women. You’re no longer that shy guy hesitating to approach a girl — you’re the alpha male in the room, the guy everyone gravitates towards.
Even when it’s just about making friends and having a great time, you’re the man who seems happy, filled with excitement and always ready to talk about something fun.
Women notice you without saying a word, drawn to your magnetic presence and unwavering self-assurance.
This newfound confidence isn’t just skin deep. It’s a fundamental shift in how you see yourself. It’s something you worked on because you wanted to overcome your insecurities. Your history of getting bullied by weak men doesn’t define you. It’s the catalyst that turns you into a man who is more attractive than most.
You’ll find yourself effortlessly striking up conversations, your natural charisma always on display. That crippling fear of rejection? It’s a thing of the past. You’ll feel free to be yourself and to enjoy talking to women – and women will love talking to you.
You’ll stop walking on eggshells or wondering if there’s something wrong with you. Women will be drawn to your genuine, self-developed masculinity.
You’ll have deep, meaningful conversations that create instant chemistry. No more awkward silences with girls – you’ll know exactly how to keep her engaged and intrigued.
This transformation goes beyond attracting women. You’ll excel in all areas of life. At work, you’ll be the guy who confidently presents his ideas, earning respect from colleagues and superiors alike. In social situations, you’ll be the life of the party, your positive energy infectious to everyone around you. Your friendships will deepen as people are drawn to your authentic, self-assured nature.
You won’t even recognize the man that you used to be.
And when it comes to relationships? You’ll finally know how to find and keep the girlfriend of your dreams. No more settling for less than you deserve. You’re shedding your identity from the past. The way you got bullied? It doesn’t matter. You’re an attractive man, worthy of receiving the love of a great girlfriend.
You’ll have the skills to create a passionate, loving, long-lasting relationship. You’ll be the boyfriend who knows how to keep the spark alive, who can navigate conflicts with ease with a confident communication style, and you will make your girlfriend feel cherished and secure — and all of this will make her go crazy for you. She will reward you emotionally, spiritually, and sexually.
Get your copy of “Book Title” and become an outgoing man who knows how to talk to women. Become a man of charisma, confidence, and boost your entire self-image to the next level.