How to recover from a breakup with your girlfriend through exercise. Hey guys, if you are currently going through a breakup, then I’m sure most of you are extremely anxious. This anxiety can often make you become very passive and the more that the heartbreak drains your energy, the more negative you’ll feel. Essentially, after a breakup, often you end up stuck in a low-energy state. So let’s talk about how you can gain your energy back, ironically by expending more energy with lots of exercise. 

Hey guys, welcome back to the Breakup Corner, I’m Andi Galster, and here I teach men how to move on from their ex-girlfriend. So, yea, breakups are really tough man. It’s actually not too uncommon that you end up with a lot of physical side effects when you’re missing an ex-girlfriend. Some people can’t sleep. Others can’t concentrate. And others can’t eat properly. Everybody’s a little bit different, but generally speaking, when you have a breakup, your body is emotionally deprived of a lot of essential ingredients. And as a result, it won’t have enough energy to function properly. 

The breakup blues are a bit like depression in that sense. And I am sure you’ve heard the common advice that in order to overcome depression or depressed feelings, you should exercise at least once a day — even if it’s only for twenty minutes. And of course, hitting the gym is a very common advice to lift your energy levels.

There’s definitely something behind the science of exercise for overcoming heartbreak and the pain of rejection — after all, workout acts almost like a painkiller. And no, that’s not anecdotal advice. That’s been studied. As a result, working out by itself helps a little bit with numbing the pain of missing an ex-girlfriend. Because breakup pain is actually physical pain. I’m sure you’re quite familiar with the feeling by now.

It’s so hard to not think about an ex-girlfriend after a breakup, isn’t it? And every time that you do, you’re in pain. This is maybe part of the reason why a really heavy workout is so helpful after a breakup. It’s actually possible to suppress physical pain in one part of your body if you feel pain in another part of your body. And of course, working out can be super painful. That’s actually the purpose of a workout. To tear your muscle fibers, so they rebuild themselves stronger again.

So I think if you’re struggling with your breakup and you can’t get over the pain of having broken up, then you should absolutely consider hitting the gym. Anything with heavy weights will be extremely helpful as a powerful and positive distraction.

But there’s the even more obvious side effect, or rather, what I would consider the main effect when working out: Working out heavily after a breakup can really help a lot with self-esteem issues. Breaking up as a man is awful because sometimes. You’re probably not in the best shape of your life anymore. Your self-esteem is on the floor. And you don’t feel like talking to anybody at all because you’re too busy dealing with all the pain. And even if you might find the courage to try to socialize or talk to women, because of all of this, you are at the very least much more likely to fail.

But at the same time, a woman will get hit on by countless men, even if she looks barely average. She doesn’t even have to do much to boost her self-esteem again. The men who will try to talk to her will do this automatically for her.

But as a man, you have to look fit and sharp at all times if you want to even get the basic attention of a woman. So after a breakup, a lot of guys look weak, timid, have no energy, and they generally seem sad and depressed — which is understandable of course. Women can feel that, and of course, even you yourself can feel it. It’s not a great feeling to feel insecure after a breakup. 

But if you go to the gym and exercise, you are going to feel a lot more attractive. Even if you don’t make massive gains. Honestly, you’ll probably even look in the mirror and feel more attractive, even though you’ve gained barely any new muscles. I’m sure you’ve seen those funny stats about men overestimating how good they look, and women underestimating it. Well, that’s true, and that’s a good thing. If you hit the gym, you’ll probably feel a confidence boost relatively quickly. 

And if you stay consistent enough and add some extra proteins to your diet, then you REALLY are also going to become way more attractive — maybe more than before your relationship ended. So not only do you get a perceived boost in attractiveness, which will manifest in your self-esteem, but in time, you will get a real visible change in your physical appearance, and of course, that will lead to more women wanting to talk to you.

At the bare minimum, what workout does to you is that it gets you in a heightened state of energy. And if you’ve ever seen a man who seems to be the man with the biggest amount of energy and confidence in the room, then you know that everybody, especially women, want to get to know that man. This is the biggest benefit that you’ll gain if you commit to a strong workout plan, or even a big workout challenge.

For most men, recovering from a breakup often is in large parts a matter of realizing that your dating life isn’t over. Something that we all have to learn is that even when our most important relationship of our life ends, it never means that we can’t find happiness again in the future with another woman. Just because that was the most important relationship to you RIGHT NOW, doesn’t mean you can’t find something like it again. 

After a breakup, we always tie all of our happiness to the last relationship that we just lost, but of course, your ex-girlfriend is not the only woman out there who will be just right for you. Relationship compatibility is primarily a matter of effort anyway. It is unrealistic that you can’t find another relationship that will make you extremely happy. So this is why going to the gym and becoming attractive again is such an essential strategy for recovering from a breakup because one day, you’ll meet that woman who can give you that new-found happiness. But only if you’re in the right emotional state to seize that opportunity. Only if you’re finding your way back to a high-energy state, will you be able to go on dates, and mesmerize the girl who makes you feel good again.

I know that most of you are feeling extremely depressed… And I think most guys can’t and don’t want to think about dating another woman after a breakup. I actually think that’s the right mindset. Relationships shouldn’t be easily replaceable. But I am sure that if you try to raise your energy levels, whether that’s with workout or with anything else, then you’re going to feel better over the coming months. And with time, either you’ll find another great woman who loves you, or you will at least make some great new friends. You know, as they say: The real treasure were the friends we made along the way. I’m only half-kidding here, actually.

Either way, no matter what outcome it’ll be, you’ll see positive results in your life. Now, what’s the best way to do it? Should it be a home workout? Should it be at the gym? Should it just be going for a run? How serious does the exercise have to be?

Well, actually, let me share a funny anecdote… A few years ago, I was back home in Germany… And I’m not sure anymore… Maybe I had a panic attack… sorta… Maybe that was during COVID… I’m not sure anymore, but the bottom line is, that I was super fucked up… And I had never felt this messed up in my life, and my dad just kept on telling me to drink some water. And I remember being so angry at him and I think I said something like “What the fuck dad? I don’t need a fucking water”… because, obviously, I was mentally very distraught. And in hindsight… Guess what? He was not wrong to offer me that glass of water. Obviously, if you research it, water has been found to have soothing effects on the body.

I’m sharing this anecdote, because, at the end of the day, all you need is anything that boosts your energy. For some of you, that could even be as basic as going for a walk. Now, is going for a walk exercise? No. But even walking has been found to boost endorphins, to reduce stress levels. The point that I want to get across is that at times, we can’t believe that simple things like a glass of water, or a 30 minute walk in the park actually helps us feel better. But it does. I also used to think that it was relatively useless during my 20s, but now in my 30s, I’ve definitely noticed the benefit of going for walks. All actions that you take, will help you feel better. So my suggestion for you is, to start wherever you can. The point is to have an open mind about the benefits of any type of exercises that you’re committing to.

It can be a short extra walk in the park. Or a short run. Then, maybe you can add a 20 minute workout every single day after work. Maybe iterate between one day being leg day, the other being, chest day, and the next could be general high intensity training. And once you feel high-energy enough, you can try out the gym. Of course, you can already try the gym as soon as possible. And the more energy you expend, ironically, the better you’re going to feel. A high intensity, super pumped up workout at the gym can do wonders to feel better. Especially if you combine all of this with a good diet plan that builds up your muscles.

But in the end, go with what works for your life’s circumstances. Maybe there’s no gym around. Or it’s too expensive for you. You can start at home, with local fitness groups, and so on. The key is that you push yourself beyond your current energy levels. And of course, one great way to do so, is also to push yourself physically. Push beyond the weights that you can lift. Push yourself harder to do 3 more reps during a handstand pushup against the wall. The key is to replenish your fighting spirit and get back into a mode of peak energy. Don’t let yourself be beaten by your breakup pain and the heartbreak. You’re an awesome fella, so fight, don’t give up, and soon, things will get better!

Anyway, that’s all I’ve got for you this time.