When you get rejected by girls for the first few times — how to learn to deal with getting dumped and rejected by women? The dating life of a man isn’t easy. The results of your success with women are always determined by your confidence and consistency to transform yourself into an attractive man. When you’re not at a base level of attractiveness, you’re sure to get rejected by women. This is especially hard when you’re still young and have practically no experience with dating women and how to respond appropriately when you get rejected by women. So how to deal with a woman’s rejection, or even getting dumped by her after some time of dating? Let’s talk about it.

Hey guys, welcome back to the Breakup Corner, I’m Andi Galster, and here I teach men how to move on from an ex-girlfriend. This one is slightly different from my usual posts, but fundamentally, I think breakups and rejection by a woman, in general, often have a lot of overlap in how they play out.

When you have a breakup, many times, it effectively means that your ex-girlfriend no longer wants to be with you. Or perhaps you didn’t want her. Sure, there are other reasons for breakups, such as generally poor communication and not being compatible in certain personality types, but as a whole, the bottom line is this: When a woman doesn’t find you attractive, or doesn’t find you attractive any longer, then she’s going to want to pay attention to other men and eventually, you’ll get left behind.

This kind of behavior by women is especially hurtful and hard to deal with the younger you are. The younger you are, the less experience you have about pretty much everything. How to keep a conversation going — and that means any conversation, not just with a woman. How to socialize, how to make money in smarter and efficient ways, how to keep fit and follow a consistent workout routine, how to stay more patient about the results that you want in life, how to properly groom yourself and dress attractively, how to be charming when talking to a woman, and so on. And the more of these insights that you lack, the more likely you are to get dumped or rejected by a woman.

All of this and more, are things that you have to learn over time. You’d be surprised how many things you can learn as you get older. I’m 35 now, and I still even sometimes revisit or reeducate myself on old subjects such as workout, attraction, and so on because you can always get a fresh or interesting perspective on life.

So as a young man, the best advice that I can give to you is to actually mentally prepare yourself for rejection because there’s no way it isn’t going to happen. Now the question is: What do I mean by preparing yourself for that? Well, truthfully, you’re never going to be ready for rejection. It always hurts. You can, of course, over time get more used to it. What I mean with preparing yourself for it, is rather that you should anticipate or expect it to happen.

The biggest challenge for a man is to realize that he’s more idealistic than women. A woman is far more often unhappy or displeased with men than the other way around. Whether that’s in a relationship, during early dating, or on the first glance. Now, hear me out. I know this sounds weird but… To me, the right winner’s mindset is to prepare yourself mentally to be a loser. Every guy will get turned down by dozens and dozens of women throughout his life, unless he finds one early on that he’ll marry.

The correct mindset for dating is to expect that as time passes, women will turn you down, or they will leave when they don’t want you, for whatever reason. And that’s ok, because in the end, if you follow your path, keep on developing yourself, become smarter and stronger, and so on, then eventually, you are going to end up at the finish line as a winner and get your ideal dream girl.

Of course, that’s not to say you should just hope and pray that with time, you’ll magically get a great girlfriend. You actually have to put in the work to become an attractive man. But over time, women will reject you less often. And when they do, it becomes less painful. And at some point of your life, it will become almost like a joke when you see one of the common “Rejection Patterns”, like women ghosting you and then coming back at the most unexpected time.

So whether you have been getting rejected for the first times, or maybe for the first time a short-term girlfriend has broken up with you, don’t be so hard on yourself. Expect that at some point, it is going to happen that a woman doesn’t want you.

But it’s not the end of the world, because the next relationship can be just around the corner. Relationships and dating, in general, are quite short-lived in younger years. Just look at the average duration of a highschool or college relationship. It’s barely 6-12 months in length.

Even if you’d be hyper attractive and you’d be doing everything mostly right, there’s still the chance that you get rejected or a girl breaks up with you after a short while. That’s part of the younger years of dating for most people.

Don’t feel defeated if you got dumped or if some girl didn’t want to talk to you at a club. As you grow older, learn more communication skills, and so on, you will naturally become more attractive to women and the amount of rejections that you’ll receive will reduce. Getting rejected in the early stages of your life is instead a great way to train yourself for the later stages of life and dating, when it counts the most to succeed with the right woman.

So if you recently got rejected or dumped for the first time, don’t wait too long to make yourself available again. Try again, go out again, go to new places and meet new women. With time and practice, the rejections will become less frequent — but remember: Always anticipate that a rejection will happen again in the future. That’s OK. Don’t let it demotivate you.

That’s not to say that you should just date right away again, when you are still feeling heartbroken about what happened, but likewise, one of the worst traits that younger guys have, is that they spend way too much time on being bummed out, when they could be talking to a nice girl right now. This effect is of course much more pronounced when seriously dating a girl, or even coming right out of a proper relationship.

One of the reasons for this, for sure, is that the younger you are… well… if it’s quite literally let’s say your first rejection, or your first short-term relationship breakup, then the chances are QUITE HIGH that this is the VERY first time for you that a girl has shown strong interest in you. For the first time, you got the attention of a girl, and she actually liked what she saw. This experience is in general already rare for men compared to women, who have countless guys wanting to date her, but of course, if you never had a girlfriend before, then this effect is at its extreme.

You haven’t learned yet that this experience won’t last forever. In the future, there will be plenty of girls who will find you attractive. So, in a sense, you have to learn to get rid of the “soulmate” mentality, where you believe that there’s only one girl for you. Of course, even though it’s rare for a girl to like you, that still doesn’t mean that it’s impossible. There’s going to be another girl in the future.

Even if the chance would only be 1% that a girl finds you attractive and really likes you, if you spend a lot of time focused on meeting 1000 girls, then you’d have already met 10 girls who wanted to get to know you. As time goes on, you will become more attractive, you’ll learn how to flirt, how to be entertaining, and you’ll probably meet so many more women in your 20s than you’ve met while you were a teenager. So, statistically speaking, it’s only a matter of time for you to find another great girl who really likes you a lot.

So instead of worrying for far too long about some girl who rejected you, try to redirect your focus as quickly as possible on positive thoughts, or, probably the more realistic outcome… Focus on positive actions and those will eventually create positive thoughts. For example, instead of becoming demotivated about some girl who rejected you and broke your heart a little bit, what if you would go to the swimming pool and practice for a triathlon. This is by the way, something that I did A LOT when I was younger. There are all kinds of things that you could spend your time on.

And of course, some of those activities could also make you extremely attractive. Back when I was younger, man, I was a really skinny stickman. I had no idea about workout and how to become muscular… I could have become extremely attractive back in those younger years with my regular swimming exercises, if only I had a good protein-rich diet on top of it. And I guarantee, far more girls would have been into me at that young age. And then, I also would have spent less time on thinking about the girls who didn’t want me. The best thing I can encourage you to do, is to be smart, and have a real useful action plan on how to make yourself more attractive as a man.

Instead of being bummed out that you are not attractive and some girl didn’t want to be yourself, I guarantee you, if you spend some time brainstorming or researching how to become attractive, and perhaps find a mentor to help you out, then you would never have to worry about any of these problems in the first place, if you’d spend a few months investing in those ideas and goals. So, my suggestion for you is, if right now you’re bummed out about some girl who rejected you: What can you do in the next 3 months to make yourself more attractive, so the next girl probably wouldn’t dare to think to reject you?

Anyway, that’s all I’ve got for you this time.